Wake Up Call
I finally met me – I woke up –
Electric and different this day, unlike the mundane
Rising at dawn from dreams and sleep routine expected.
Existing merely physically, detached
Every day for nearly half a century –
No…on this day, I woke up grasping
Who I am supposed to be and why.
Tangible…purpose and meaning defined, illuminated with color –
Why have I been absent this long?
Analytic references unveil scattered playbills of the past –
Connecting dots, searching for missing/mismatched puzzle pieces
Swept under the rug, hidden away…on purpose,
Yet realizing, all was actually left out in plain view, overlooked,
My eyes wide shut – why are my eyes open now?
I finally met me – I fessed up –
Confrontation, truthful realization of self is daunting –
Detachment and donning “people pleaser” costumes is easier –
Takes its toll, paid the price
Every day for nearly half a century.
No more – this day I fessed up –
Admitted lies, ugly truths and un-pleasantries –
Calling a truce between me & myself –
Decisions, circumstances and outcomes –
Actions proved destructive to relationships, mind/body,
Scarring the soul. Why come clean now?
I finally know me – I rose up –
Invigorated, scared, yet courageously driven –
Void of self-pity, self-loathing,
Capable of facing my fears, battles, demons –
I celebrate this re-inventive revival once clouded
Every day for 47 years.
Never again – today I rose up –
To the wake-up call.