FREE ~

~ Sue Austin ~ 

FREE
~ Inspired by Sue Austin …and everyone living with chronic illness.
                                               
I broke free from you – in search of me
            No more chains – alone, able to move – to be free 
            Released from binding troubles which control me
            Free from pain, from fear and controversy
            Graceful, my aquatic ballet – dreamlike, I’m normal
            Unchained from stiff limits which impound me
            Free from hurt, chronic burdens which haunt me
            Unassisted, following my map – holding the key
            Floating, flying free from scars and those who pity
            Free to smile, to breathe…to be me. 
original work by MPP2013

 Become inspired and greatly moved by viewing this breathtakingly BEAUTIFUL video of Sue Austin!   YouTube has many more interviews, videos, etc. available to view about Sue Austin.  
           

            

Relapsing Remitting Melancholia

I started writing this poem years ago when I was feeling very lost in my life.  Besides having MS, I was dealing with a lot of overwhelming challenges.  Life happens…and it sometimes it really sucks!  But, always remember, “this too shall pass”.  Therefore, when I pulled this poem out tonight, I decided to re-make it as two parts…kind of like “Act 1 & 2”, if you will.

RELAPSING REMITTING MELANCHOLIA 
I.
Body numb, mind hopeless
Despair and fear un-relentless
Giving in to exquisite pain, my solitude
Losing my grip, myself with senseless magnitude –
Daily plans feel meaningless
Nightly dreams lack peacefulness
Gasping, grasping tether – latitude – longitude
Needful – yet disbelieving in life’s gratitude –
           
Absent years, lifeless stares
The bottle sedates, sensory impairs
Words and passion unraveled, unglued
Thoughts of love and life never pursued.
II.
Defining drama – realize, accept it fully
Own it, embrace the melancholy
Surrender, release, do silence better
Pray for peaceful breaks in the weather –      
           
Daily plans offer harmony
Nightly dreams encourage epiphany
Desiring, designing new paths from life’s longitude
Hopeful – believing life’s gratitude.

MPP 2012

"The Sleeping Game": An Insomniac’s Poem

The Sleeping Game
Insomniac routine –
‘Tis unwanted playtime for
My brain.  Frenetic bed-time activity –
Been here, done this before – chronic
Noise filled solitude ensues.
Welcome to the sleeping game.
The players are me… and me.
Nightly, recruited by a forceful scout,
I unwillingly participate in
Irrational game play, pleading forfeit –
Such a request overruled, denied.
There is no regard for season, inclement weather,
No empathy for injury or illness –
No one gives up, no one quits.
The match between brain and body…
There is no winner.
The game ensues, becoming quizzical.
To-do lists, NOT-to-do lists, WHY-did-I-do-that lists –
Permeate my conscience in search of answers,
Full knowing, it’s all for naught. No matter…
3:00am has now come and gone.
Momentary common sense, rational thoughts
Attempts to mediate the scuffle, fleeting
Separate grandiose vs. fantastical reality.
TIME OUT…for now –
Acceptance of moiety will suffice…for now –
Until tomorrow, when the game resumes again…

As it always does.
MPP:2013

Tough By Nature: "Be Yourself" ~ Cowgirl Poetry

For all the “tough by nature” women and cowgirls out there, here is a lovely treasure!

BE YOURSELF  
by Georgie Sicking


When I was young and foolish
The women said to me
Take off those spurs and comb your hair,
If a lady you will be.


Forget about those cowboy ways
Come and sit awhile
We will try to clue you in
On women’s ways and wiles.


Take off that Levi jumper,
Put up those batwing chaps
Put on a little makeup and we can
Get a date for you “perhaps.”


Forget about that roping,
That will make callouses on your hands
And you know it takes soft fingers
If you want to catch a man.


Do away with that Stetson hat
For it will crush your curls
And even a homely cowboy
Wouldn’t date a straighthaired girl.


Now being young and foolish
I went my merry way
And I guess I never wore a dress
Until my wedding day.


Now I will tell my children,
No matter what you do
Stand up straight and tall,
Be you and only you.

Artist: Lynda Lanker

~ Georgie Sicking: (born 1921)
A true cowboy poet, & a lifelong working cowgirl
Inducted into the National Cowgirl Hall of Fame in 1989

The Story

There are songs that all of us fall in love with and will enjoy for a lifetime – but sometimes, there’s that ONE song which move us, touches us in a certain way that affects our soul and make us feel as if it were written specifically for us.  That ONE song for me is “The Story” by Brandi Carlile.  I heard it years ago at a time in my life when I needed it most…and was the inspiration for much of my poetry.

Here is the music with the lyrics added – Absolutely beautiful – I hope you enjoy!!!!

Wake Up Call:

Wake Up Call
I finally met me – I woke up –
Electric and different this day, unlike the mundane
Rising at dawn from dreams and sleep routine expected.
Existing merely physically, detached
Every day for nearly half a century –
No…on this day, I woke up grasping
Who I am supposed to be and why.
Tangible…purpose and meaning defined, illuminated with color –
Why have I been absent this long? 
Analytic references unveil scattered playbills of the past –
Connecting dots, searching for missing/mismatched puzzle pieces
Swept under the rug, hidden away…on purpose,
Yet realizing, all was actually left out in plain view, overlooked,
My eyes wide shut – why are my eyes open now?
I finally met me – I fessed up –
Confrontation, truthful realization of self is daunting –
Detachment and donning “people pleaser” costumes is easier –
Takes its toll, paid the price
Every day for nearly half a century.
No more – this day I fessed up –
Admitted lies, ugly truths and un-pleasantries –
Calling a truce between me & myself –
Decisions, circumstances and outcomes –
Actions proved destructive to relationships, mind/body,
Scarring the soul. Why come clean now?
I finally know me – I rose up –
Invigorated, scared, yet courageously driven –
Void of self-pity, self-loathing,
Capable of facing my fears, battles, demons –
I celebrate this re-inventive revival once clouded
Every day for 47 years.
Never again – today I rose up –
To the wake-up call. 

                                                                                                                       
                                               

MPP:  10/18/2013

"Goodbye & Good luck": A Divorce Song

I wrote this a few years ago while going through an awful divorce.  It’s a poem, yet intended to be lyrics for a song I have yet to compose.

GOODBYE AND GOOD LUCK
It’s amazing, it’s incredible
How and why it’s come to this
This blazing, this indelible
            Ink spot I won’t miss……..or will I?
Who are you, who were you?
Why did I turn and close my eyes?
Through my love drunk window I accepted the view
            So, it’s really no surprise
            Goodbye and good luck
            You’ll need it my dear
            I don’t really give a fuck
                        Because my conscience is clear……..or is it?
            Goodbye and good luck
            What comes around goes around
            How does it feel to be abandoned, stuck
                        In solitude, your cowardly head stuck in the ground
                                    Wondering if you’ll ever be found…
It’s amazing, it’s incredible
How and why it’s come to pass
I’ve gained clarity, you’re so readable
This drama will be my last.
Who are you, who were you?
I knew it wouldn’t last
The clues the clues, OH, those obvious clues
I’ll heal, I’ll move on and, I’ll put this in the past
            Goodbye and good luck
            Thank God, it’s truly the end
            Still, each feather you pluck from me
                        Is painful, I cringe, but I won’t bend
                                    Unto you my darling, this message I send…….or will I?
Goodbye and good luck
You’ll need it, you’ll see
Crawling out of this mire, this muck
Out from you and me.